Saturday, July 8, 2017

A Fake Story About a Fake President At a Fake G-20 Summit

Here's a fake story about a fake President who calls well-researched news fake....  However, parts of this story are true, and none of the photos have been manipulated.

The President of the United is actually a puppet.  He is currently inhabited by Dominar Rygel XVI, who is the deposed ruler of the Hynerian empire, which has over 600 billion subjects.  The Dominar is known to be selfish, a coward, a liar, a thief, and an opportunist, and he loves to frell....
Recently, the fake President traveled to Hamburg, Germany, via London and Warsaw.  In London, a government ​limousine was waiting, parked at the bottom of the airplane steps.  The fake President wandered off in another direction, seemingly totally blind to the huge armored deluxe sedan that was sitting 6 feet away from him.
   In Warsaw, the pube-hair turbaned idiot was asked if he believed that Russia had interfered in the election that saw him made President.  He waffled - well, he said, he had been told that the governmental spy agencies, about 3 or 4 of them, had tried to say that.  Did he believe Russia had done it, he was again asked.  Well yes, Russia did it.  But, then it could have been Russia, or it could have been any other country or person.  (In America, we know that he famously believes it was a 400-pound man sitting on his bed in a basement - sounds like he knows something, eh?)  The leader of Poland had assured the fake President that he would be greeted by cheering crowds, and he was - by people bussed into Warsaw from all over the country, who were given a daily stipend, and who were supplied with both United States flags and a few Confederate battle flags.  (Disgusting.)
   Upon arrival in Hamburg for the G20 Summit, the man known for owning so many luxury hotels and golf courses around the world found out that he did not have a place to stay, to sleep, to eat, or to relieve himself.  The upper-echelon hotels and motels had all been booked for months.  So the Cheeto-head decided to blame the Obama White House staff, and then threw himself upon the mercy of the German people.

  Poor Angela Merkel!  She had to agree to put up the US entourage in the German Senate guest
​house, with the orange P using the US Consulate staff as his maids and service staff.  The disgrace of having the orange bobble-head stay in the government house was almost too much for Chancellor Merkel to bear....
     And, of course, everyone was waiting for the arrival of Vladimir Putin - especially the fake President.
   Once the P and his Slovenian Slut arrived at the villa, which was built in 1868, he kept saying, "Everything's going to be fine.  Look, they told me the interior is decorated in bright colors, mostly white, so it'll be like we're in DC."
   In the meantime, a great many protesters were gathering for the Summit in the city.  There were many dressed completely in black, covered with long black trench coats, black masks, and black hats.  More than 120 German police were injured by the protesters during the first 24 hours. But there were also more whimsical protesters in Hamburg, too.

   Unfortunately, other meetings and speeches with other members of the G20 governments had to handled first, and the fake Pres looked a little frustrated as time went on without him sighting his paramour.   With the P searching the room for, and finally seeing "his Vladi", Emmanuel Macron seemed quite amused....
Other scheduled meetings intervened, and the P wasn't happy to be told, jokingly, that his pube-hair turbaned hairstyle made others think of swallows' nests - which was making someone else feel hungry...  
​Then the men who like delicately flavored foods shared a laugh, with Cheeto-head on the outside of the joke, as 

After looking at the scheduled  meeting times, the fake P cuts Chancellor Merkel out of the crowd and tells her in no uncertain terms that he will need more time with Putin.  "Got that?  I need more time with Vladi!"   Merkel was
taken aback.
      ​Finally, the appointed time has arrived - the first, openly seen greeting:

And, before their private meeting, a pulse-taking handshake, mentally asking, "Are you as excited as I am?"
   After the meeting originally scheduled for 30 minutes, but lasting 136 minutes (2 hours and 16) - satisfaction is
clearly seen:

    And someone, who shall remain un-named, thought he got the best of it....
   A while later, the P honestly tells Prime Minister Trudeau and Chancellor Merkel that he truly hopes they'll be having a big steak with fries, lots of ketchup, and a chocolate cake for their big fancy supper.
They inform him it will be birds-nest soup, followed by sauerkraut and wienerschnitzel....
​and the fake President is, again, unhappy.​

    After the fancy supper, it was time to get into glad-rags and go to a concert - the P wasn't happy and neither was his purely-dressed baby-momma, because
they knew there would be a meeting between the P's two lovers - and Vladi doesn't like to be the shortest man.  (The orange queef removes his shoes with lifts when they're together.)
   The following morning, the fake President wanted to get word to his Vladi that, even though he spent the night in the same house with his woman, Vladi is the best!
Then the love-besotted "Commander in Chief" fell asleep while dreaming of Vladi's powerful hands while in a public meeting.  Prime Minister May had to awaken him after he farted and then snored loudly.   She, like Queen Victoria, was not amused.

    Having shat himself while farting and dreaming of Vladi, the orange P couldn't attend one of the major G20 meetings, having to go back to the German Senate house to shower and change his clothes.  So he sent his daughter, Ivanka Kushner, to sit in his place and represent the United States of America.  Chancellor Merkel looked at Ivanka, and felt ill herself, having to leave the meeting hastily.
      What was extremely amazing to me was seeing the daughter-that-Daddy-lusts-for ​sitting in the meeting for the Women Entrepreneurs Finance Initiative ("We-Fi") that the G20 and International Monetary Fund have set up to assist women start companies in developing countries.  I was amazed because of the world's knowledge that the Ivanka pays her workers in the Far East less than $1 per week for 60 hours of work.
When Ivanka proudly stated that she paid top wages for excellent work in her companies, International Monetary Fund Managing Director Christine Lagarde almost swallowed her tongue, and had a difficult time controlling her laughter.  Poor Ivanka didn't realize the joke was on her.

And so, the fake President of the United States continues to see himself as a huge raptor, a man of real instinctual decisions, one who will be remembered in American history as a true giant of statesmanship, an intellectual equal to Aristotle, and a man who is a venerable historian.

Those of us who see what he really is, who do not fall easily under his personal glamour and the thrall of his power, know that he is a puppet of Vladimir Putin and Russia.  And we hear Hilary Clinton calling him a puppet in a Presidential debate - and, then, somehow, hear Dominar Rygel XVI squeal loudly:

The End
(of my fake story - but, then again, maybe not...)​

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